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Infatuation

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From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

An illustrated depiction of Mahābhārata character Ulupi becoming infatuated with Arjuna

Infatuation refers to being "in love" or intensely "love smitten", with possible connotations of youth, irrationality, foolishness, or capriciousness.[1][2][3][4][5] An individual may be considered infatuated with a person they do not know well yet,[1][3] or whom others view as unsuitable.[2][6] In the triangular theory of love, "infatuation" refers to romantic passion in the absence of intimacy or commitment, as in love at first sight and limerence.[7][8] A simple infatuation which is more short-lived may be referred to as a crush,[9][10] or "puppy love" in adolescence.[9][11] Infatuation might also be compared to the "honeymoon phase" of a relationship.[12]

The word infatuated appeared in the mid-17th century, taking its root from fatuus (Latin, meaning "foolish"), and has carried the connotation of irrationality ever since.[10] The psychology professor Dorothy Tennov considered "infatuation" to be among pejorative labels for intense romantic attachments.[13]

Infatuation versus love

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According to the spiritual teacher Meher Baba: "In infatuation, the person is a passive victim of the spell of conceived attraction for the object. In love there is an active appreciation of the intrinsic worth of the object of love."[14]

Psychologist Frank D. Cox said that infatuation could be distinguished from romantic love only when looking back on a particular case of being attracted to a person but which may also evolve into a mature love.[15] Goldstein and Brandon describe infatuation as the first stage of a relationship before developing into a mature intimacy.[16]

Features

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Ian Kerner, a sex therapist, stated that infatuation usually occurred at the beginning of relationships, which is "marked by a sense of excitement and euphoria, and it's often accompanied by lust and a feeling of newness and rapid expansion with a person".[12]

Youth

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Adolescents often make people an object of extravagant, short-lived passion or temporary love.[citation needed]

The possible effects of infatuation and love relationships on the academic behaviour of adolescent students were examined in research. The outcome shows that many participants had distraction, stress, and poor academic performance as a result of love relationships and infatuation. Furthermore, the findings highlighted that this has a detrimental effect on learning behaviour among teenagers who are in romantic or infatuated relationships.[17]

Types

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Three types of infatuation have been identified by Brown: the first type is characterized by being "carried away, without insight or proper evaluative judgement, by blind desire"; the second, closely related, by being "compelled by a desire or craving over which the agent has no control" while "the agent's evaluation ... may well be sound although the craving or love remains unaffected by it"; and the third is that of "the agent who exhibits bad judgement and misvaluation for reasons such as ignorance or recklessness".[18]

Transference

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In psychoanalysis, a sign that the method is taking hold[citation needed] is "the initial infatuation to be observed at the beginning of treatment",[19][original research?] the beginning of transference. The patient, in Freud's words, "develops a special interest in the person of the doctor ... never tires in his home of praising the doctor and of extolling ever new qualities in him".[20]

What occurs, "it is usually maintained ... is a sort of false love, a shadow of love".[21] However, psychoanalyst Janet Malcolm claims that it is wrong to convince the patient "that their love is an illusion ... that it's not you she loves. Freud was off base when he wrote that. It is you. Who else could it be?"[22]

Intellectual infatuation

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For example Jung's initial "'unconditional devotion' to Freud's theories and his 'no less unconditional veneration' of Freud's person" was seen at the time by both men as a "quasi-religious infatuation";[23] while Freud in turn was "very attracted by Jung's personality",[24] perhaps "saw in Jung an idealized version of himself":[25] they were "intellectually infatuated with one another".[26]

Collective infatuation

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But there are also collective infatuations. Thus, for instance, "the recent intellectual infatuation with structuralism and post-structuralism"[27] arguably lasted at least until[improper synthesis?] "September 11 ended intellectual infatuation with postmodernism"[28] as a whole.

Literary depictions

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Shakespeare's sonnets have been described by R. P. Blackmur as "a poetics for infatuation", dominated by infatuation as a theme: "its initiation, cultivation, and history, together with its peaks of triumph and devastation".[29]

In Ivan Turgenev's First Love, a novella from 1860, 16-year-old Woldemar becomes rapturously infatuated with Zinaida, the beautiful daughter of a princess who lives next to his house. Even though she does spend time with him, his intense infatuation is unrequited and he sinks into depression.[citation needed]

See also

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References

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  1. 1 2 Eastwick, Paul; Finkel, Eli (2009). "Infatuation". In Reis, Harry; Sprecher, Susan (eds.). Encyclopedia of Human Relationships. Sage Publishing. pp. 843–846. ISBN 9781506320403. The term infatuation typically refers to the early stages of romantic love, before the infatuated individual has had a chance to get to know or develop an intimate relationship with the love object. Colloquially, infatuation is frequently associated with youth and suggests an irrational, capricious approach to love. Although some consider infatuation to be a special, perhaps early or intense form of passionate love, researchers often use the term infatuation interchangeably with passion, passionate love, limerence, or being in love.
  2. 1 2 Money 1997, p. 308: "infatuation: a state of being intensely love smitten at an age or with a partner which others in authority deem unsuitable."
  3. 1 2 Branden & Branden 1982, pp. 23–24: "The literal meaning of infatuation is 'to be made foolish or fatuous, to be deprived of sound judgment.' In the context of relationships, infatuation means an intense attraction to another arising from our focusing on one or two aspects of the other as if those aspects represented the whole. [...] If we are confused about whether our feelings are infatuation or love, it is useful to ask some questions. How much do I really know about this person? [...] What do we have in common—and what makes me think so? An impulse to rush past these questions is reason enough to suspect infatuation."
  4. ↑ Knox & Schacht 2009, pp. 45, 48: "[...] infatuation is about emotional feelings based on little actual exposure to the love object. [...] Infatuation is sometimes regarded as synonymous with romantic love. Infatuation comes from the same root as fatuous, meaning 'silly' or 'foolish,' and refers to a state of passion or attraction that is not based on reason."
  5. ↑ "infatuation". Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary. Merriam-Webster. OCLC 1032680871.
  6. ↑ Hatfield & Walster 1985, pp. 51–53
  7. ↑ Sternberg, Robert (1986). "A triangular theory of love". Psychological Review. 93 (2): 119–135. doi:10.1037/0033-295X.93.2.119.
  8. ↑ Sternberg, Robert (1987). "Liking versus loving: A comparative evaluation of theories". Psychological Bulletin. 102 (3): 331–345. doi:10.1037/0033-2909.102.3.331.
  9. 1 2 Short 2004, pp. 16–17: "Simple infatuation is often called a 'crush' or 'puppy love.' It commonly strikes those in the early teens or younger. [...] Simple infatuations seldom last long. But when you have one, you may be greatly moved with emotion. You'll spend much time in daydreams and wishful fantasies. [...] Romantic infatuation is what most people mean when they speak of 'romantic love.' Unfortunately, they often drop 'romantic' and just call it 'love,' which is most confusing. Romantic infatuation is the same as being 'in love.' It is what is meant when people speak of 'falling in love.'"
  10. 1 2 Morton 2009, p. 46: "The word infatuated, too, has denoted a kind of irrational love since it appeared in the mid seventeenth century. That sense is reflected in the word's etymology, which goes back to the Latin fatuus, meaning foolish.
    Usually an infatuation is fleeting. At first you might feel a tightness in your chest, but that physical symptom usually goes away in a few weeks. If it does, what you experienced was probably a crush, so called because of the feeling of thoracic constriction. [...] Sometimes this kind of infatuated love is referred to as limerence, a term coined in 1976 by psychologist Dorothy Tennov."
  11. ↑ Tyyskä, Vappu (2014-01-02). Youth and Society: The Long and Winding Road, Third Edition. Canadian Scholars’ Press. p. 162. ISBN 978-1-55130-543-1. It is customary to view young people's dating relationships and first relationships as 'puppy love' or 'infatuation' in contrast with adults' presumably deeper and more committed relationships.
  12. 1 2 Adebowale, Temi (28 June 2019). "What's the Difference Between Love and Infatuation?". www.menshealth.com. Men's Health. Retrieved 27 October 2019.
  13. ↑ Tennov 1999, pp. 85, 167
  14. ↑ Baba, Meher (1967). Discourses. Volume I. San Francisco: Sufism Reoriented. p. 159. ISBN 978-1-880619-09-4.
  15. ↑ Frank D. Cox, Human Intimacy (2008) p. 72.
  16. ↑ A. Goldstein and M. Brandon, Reclaiming Desire (2009) p. 232.
  17. ↑ Gouda, Gururaj Ganapati; D’Mello, Laveena (2021-02-22). "Infatuation, Romantic Relationship and Learning Behaviour among School Going Adolescents". International Journal of Management, Technology, and Social Sciences. 6 (1): 71–82. doi:10.47992/ijmts.2581.6012.0130. ISSN 2581-6012.
  18. ↑ Robert Brown (1987), Analyzing Love. Cambridge University Press, p. 38. ISBN 0-521-34038-1.
  19. ↑ Jacques Lacan, Ecrits: A Selection (London 1997) p. 241.
  20. ↑ Sigmund Freud, Introductory Lectures in Psychoanalysis (PFL 1) p. 491.
  21. ↑ Jacques Lacan, The Four Fundamental Concepts of Psycho-Analysis (London 1993) p. 123.
  22. ↑ Janet Malcolm, Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession (London 1988) p. 149.
  23. ↑ Peter Gay, Freud: A Life for Our Time (London 1989) p. 204.
  24. ↑ Ernest Jones, The Life and Work of Sigmund Freud (Penguin 1964) p. 328.
  25. ↑ Frank McLynn, Carl Gustav Jung (London 1996) p. 157.
  26. ↑ Anthony Stevens, Jung (Oxford 1994) p. 12.
  27. ↑ Sally Banes, Terpsichore in Sneakers (1980) p. xxviii.
  28. ↑ David Stoesz, Quixote's Ghost (2005).
  29. ↑ R. P. Blackmur, J. T Jones, Outsider at the Heart of Things (1989) p. 242.

Sources

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Further reading

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  • Harville, H. PhD. (1992). Keeping the Love You Find, New York: Pocket Books.
  • Glencoe/McGraw-Hill. (2000). Whitney, DeBruyne, Sizer-Webb, Health: Making Life Choices (pp. 494–496)
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