Talk:Small talk

Nice article

Nice article. I feel well informed without being overwhelmed by specialist detail. I found the discussion of cultural and gender differences in the kinds of small talk that are acceptable to be especially interesting. My compliments to the editors of this article.—Blanchette (talk) 19:52, 2 February 2010 (UTC)

Hear, hear! Max (talk) 15:25, 26 March 2010 (UTC)

I'm just impressed that there's even page for "small talk." And that there's a talk page for "small talk." Oh, Wikipedia, will your wonders never cease? dkamouflage (talk) 19:57, 19 September 2012 (UTC)

Let's make small talk on the small talk talk page. Morning, dkamouflage. 38.106.112.10 (talk) 12:21, 16 June 2014 (UTC)

Definitional problems / inconsistency

The intro defines small talk as any non-necessary or non-transactional conversation, including "conversation for its own sake." Wouldn't that definition include a lot of the "biggest," most meaningful conversation, such as on one's deepest fears and hopes, or on the meaning of life? To me that is the opposite of "small talk," which is so called because it covers trivial matters, and is seen as pointless, something that we engage in only to avoid the social discomfort of not talking. At least, that's what I think of when I hear the phrase. After all, it is pejorative.

Maybe I am misreading because a later section gives the usual examples of small talk: the weather, sports, etc.

And yet under "Gender Differences," women are described as using small talk to share secrets and strengthen emotional bonds. Again, seems like the opposite of small talk.

But if we go back to "Purpose," it says that small talk has seemingly "little useful purpose," and is a "ritual" and "a strategy for managing interpersonal distance." (emphasis added) Bottom line I see two definitions of small talk going on here... one "small" and one "big"... Or am I mistaken? 174.63.85.80 (talk) 06:25, 12 February 2012 (UTC)

People using animal sounds as small talk

I deleted the following section:

"Some couples use different non-human, mostly pet-related sounds (like soft barking or meowing) in greeting and some other situations instead of small talk."

I found this quite ridiculous, and since it had no reference, I went ahead and deleted it.Thorsager (talk) 22:57, 6 March 2012 (UTC)

Origin of term in Malinowski

The swedish version of this page appears to be saying that the saying was invented by a polish anthropologist (working in the UK) called Malinowski. Is this true, any one--2001:708:110:201:216:CBFF:FEBD:2D9C (talk) 12:39, 25 March 2014 (UTC)?

Image used to represent smalltalk

Recent edits to the article brought back a drawing that 'demonstrated' small talk, but it was such a rough example that I couldn't help but feel it hurt the quality of the article. In my opinion, Simon Glücklich' Paar im Gespräch, meanwhile, serves as a better illustration of smalltalk in action, and so I reverted the article back. If readers need an example for what smalltalk actually is in practice, the contents of the article accurate describe that. 142.170.76.132 (talk) 07:26, 31 October 2023 (UTC)

(Made some late-night typos in this argument, it's late here, but the point still stands) 142.170.76.132 (talk) 07:30, 31 October 2023 (UTC)

I've reverted the article image back again to Paar im Gespräch. The now-replaced image, shown here, serves as a poor example of small talk. Apart from its wordy nature, such an unrealistic scenario removes the human-nature of small talk and arguably isn't even small talk at all; I would like to believe that our first communications with an alien race would be considered quite a significant conversation.

142.170.76.239 (talk) 22:12, 19 February 2025 (UTC)

Countersignaling

I think that in the gender differences section, what's mentioned as 'signalling'

"...the men are signalling that they are comfortable enough..."

is actually an example of Countersignaling, which may be interesting to link to for readers. AnUnusedWikiUsername (talk) 03:12, 1 February 2024 (UTC)

Wiki Education assignment: Writing Workshop

This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 23 January 2024 and 3 May 2024. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Liveeatsleep, Frozentomato, Aaaaaa231 (article contribs).

— Assignment last updated by Liveeatsleep (talk) 19:03, 16 April 2024 (UTC)

This is a buncha Crappy nonesense It makes sense on paper but thats not how real people talk tho. LIKE NO ONE IN THE WHOLE WIDER WORLD TALKS THIS WAY LIKE BRAHHHHHHHHH WHATS GOING ON HERE 2A04:EE41:2:F402:A912:C849:372A:E72F (talk) 21:36, 27 April 2025 (UTC)

Move discussion in progress

There is a move discussion in progress on Talk:Small talk (disambiguation) which affects this page. Please participate on that page and not in this talk page section. Thank you. —RMCD bot 00:34, 2 August 2025 (UTC)

What if not everyone is of the same gender?

The Gender differences section talks about small talk between women and then about small talk between men. But it says nothing about what happens when a man and a woman, or more generally a mixed group of people, engage in small talk. Indeed, the section appears to have been written under the false premise that this is an impossible scenario.

Looking at what it does say, the best I can make out is that, when a man and a woman engage in small talk, the man is trying to compete while the woman is trying to cooperate. And she is more likely to reveal her innermost secrets, while he is much more reserved about sharing his. I must say I don't seem to experience this in my friendships or social groups. But if studies have shown this to be the case, the same studies must have given insight into how the difference in how men and women engage in small talk impacts the pair/group dynamic, but the section here says nothing about this. If this isn't what happens, any serious study must have given insight into what does happen in such settings.

In any case, this is a huge hole in the content of the section, which needs to be addressed somehow. — Smjg (talk) 12:41, 1 January 2026 (UTC)

It would also make more sense for this article to merge Gender differences and Cultural differences together since the social performativity associated with small talks is a function of both gender and culture interacting with each other; they don’t exist in a vacuum. The fact that this section only cites one source from 1992 doesn’t help either. While I have no source to back it up at the moment (all anecdotal), I doubt that the ‘men engage in verbal sparring’ and vice versa for women wouldn’t really hold up beyond the Western hemisphere (North America, West Europe, etc.). It would be interesting to see research about how small talks are performed between genders of different cultures. More research is definitely needed for this section to feel more comprehensive and nuanced. ir (talk) 01:48, 8 March 2026 (UTC)

Wiki Education assignment: Interpersonal and Small Group Communication

This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 2 May 2026 and 21 June 2026. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Alexysbales98, Heavrox19, Samiahnoel, Doeyjean (article contribs). Peer reviewers: Lavender 545, Heiwillmcom, Ribaypereznunez, Nischit Dhungel, Adaily115.

— Assignment last updated by KatieKassler1 (talk) 19:56, 1 June 2026 (UTC)